2014-01-15

Project 52-Week 02–Last Minute Charlie Already

So, like I said, I'm going to try this project where I take a picture a week, so I start taking more pictures, and with 3 hours left in the week*, I finally take this week's picture.

I'd taken a few pictures during the week, but wasn't really moved by any of them.  We'd had some snow and cold, and I was thinking of taking a great shot of the Chicago River with the sky blue and the ice crystals steaming off of it.  But it was cold, and the river is like, 4 blocks away, and so I, ummm, didn't.

So, I grabbed a couple items that were sitting on my desk for the shot:

P52-02A-Small-Plastic-Iron-

The book, How To Be A Villain, is a playbook for my retirement, and helped me generate my pseudonym: "Baron Von Bloodhammer".  And the small plastic Iron Giant is a great Christmas gift from my lovely wife, Cora.  Two seconds of composition to hide the massive mess on my desk, and BOOM!, there you go.


The two rejects were:

P52-02B-Ice-Meter

The iced over gas meter.  It looked pretty cool when I passed it in the morning, but I didn't have a chance snap a picture.  By the time I got home and took a picture, the ice didn't look nearly as nice, and the lighting was gawd-awful.

P52-02C-Frozen-Banana

And while I appreciate whoever drew the frozen banana on the box at the L stop, once again, I just didn't like the lighting.  The flash totally washed it out, and with no flash it was too dark.


* Week – I want to eventually get on a Monday – Sunday week schedule, but right now, I'm just making it in the 7 day increments since the start of the year.

2014-01-07

Project 52–Week 01

A few years back, my lovely bride, Cora, did something referred to as "Project 365".  That's where you take a picture a day for a year.

While she did a great job, WOW!, is that more commitment than I can muster.

Way more.

So I'm going to try something a little more my speed:  "Project 52".

I'm going to take a picture a week this year, and post them here.  Or I'm going to try.  You know how these things go.  Also, with a wife who is a true shutterbug, she's always taking pictures, so she's rarely in them.  That's not fair.  She's far too pretty not to be in front of the camera, too.

So, here's my first entry.  It was taken on January 2nd from Salty's, in West Seattle.  I liked the composition that it presented me with, with the piling in the foreground, the red tug in the middle, and the skyline in the background.

P52-01-Sound-Picture

Below is a second shot I took a little earlier, with Cora's small camera in panoramic mode. (The deck doesn't actually curve like that.)

P52-01-Sound-Picture-01

Yes, I know my wife isn't in either of these pictures, but while I had my camera out, I did get some good pictures of her.  And that's the real point of this whole deal.

2014-01-01

A New Year's Public Service Announcement

This announcement has nothing to do particularly with New Year's Day, New Year's Eve, 2014, or any other bit of calendar monkey business.

In fact, this advice is a tale as old as time.  A song as old as rhyme.

Razzle-Dazzle-02

- THESE ARE NOT PANTS!

- THE DAZZLE CAMOUFLAGE ISN'T FOOLING ANYONE.

Back in WWI, and to a lesser part, WWII, some ships were painted with a paint scheme, often referred to as "razzle dazzle" or "dazzle camouflage".  It was not designed to hide the ships from the enemy, so much as to confuse the enemy gunners as to the size, shape, speed, and/or bearing of a ship, throwing off the optical range finders so as to cause them difficulty in acquiring a firing solution. 

These tights are NOT going to break up your silhouette and fool anybody into thinking that your Ticonderoga class cruiser of a backside is really a sleek little Arleigh Burke destroyer (ship designations in honor of Skydad).

Especially if you are wearing them as pants.  Seriously!  Look in a mirror and ask yourself, "Is this the first impression I want to make today?"  If the answer is "yes", beg your momma, or her closest living relative to slap some sense into you (unless "Auntie" is a hoochie, too, then you're screwed).  There are probably 6 women on the planet with legs and buttocks shaped correctly to wear tights as pants in public.

YOU ARE NOT ONE OF THEM.

They are some of the (butt not all) Victoria Secret models.  You might be fine, butt reality check, you aren't that fine.  Go put on a skirt, or a tunic sweater or something and cover that up a little.  Trust me, the world NEEDS THE MYSTERY.

I mean, do you want to look like this from behind?  People will be gouging their eyes out behind you in line at McDonalds while you get your McRib, fries and a Diet Coke.

Razzle-Dazzle-01

And this goes double for wearing ecru (see, I know a few of the fancy "women color" words) tights worn as pants.  You look naked and like someone spackled your ass crack closed.  You are personally contributing toward the breakdown in society.  Stop it.  I don't care if they match your skin color or not.

I don't care what you wear for "special sexy time" around the house, do not cross your threshold into any common or public area looking like some idiot who forgot to put pants on.  Even if you are not getting out of the car.  Not an excuse.

I mean, we don't have to go full Victorian again, but a little modesty, people.  And that goes for you, too, "Mr. Bicycle Pants on The L".  No one wants to sit in a seat with your "package" at eye level.

Where's the eye bleach?