2009-02-19

I saw the WHOLE thing!

The other day, Cora told a story of riding her bike down a set of stairs. (Read the full post HERE). It brought to mind one of my classic family stories. One that gets retold every Christmas when we're all around. One that doesn't need to be told, because the tag line "I saw the whole thing." Is short hand for the story.

One thing I want to be clear about:

EVERY MEMBER OF MY FAMILY TELLS THIS THE SAME WAY. NO ONE EVER, NOT EVEN MY LITTLE BROTHER, MODIFIES IT FOR ME TO BE GUILTY. NO ONE WAS SERIOUSLY INJURED.

The scene: We lived in an old farm house. Upstairs, I shared a room with my younger brother, who is 4.5 years younger than I am. The doorway to the room opened down a short hall. At end of the hall (4 steps from the doorway, then 90° left turn) was the 13 step stairway, that ended at a door. Not to code, but there was no code when this was built. Shallow steps and no midpoint landing, the last step was smack against the door, which had a knob and latch, which my parents would often shut when we were playing upstairs.

I'm 8-ish, and sitting at the desk, reading. Probably something like THIS, when I look to my right and see my little brother at the head of the stairs. Sitting on top of this plastic, injection molded tractor. He looked over, smiled at me, and then...

GONE!!!!!

I heard a series of thuds and thumps and then a whack as he and then the tractor crashed into the door at the bottom stairs. This was followed by some serious squalling.

This is one of the funniest things I had ever seen, so naturally, I'm laughing my fool head off when I get to the top of the stairs and look down and the crumpled mass below.

And then my parents open the door, and he fell out at there feet. Crying. And I'm standing up at the top of the stairs. Laughing. Before they could ask, I blurted out:

"I saw the whole thing."

To their credit, I was not beaten half to death. My brother confirmed my version and "I saw the whole thing" became a family catch phrase.

13 comments:

Cora said...

Oh God, Scope! That's hilarious! And of course an 8 year old would react that way - my little brother once fell off a second story deck, right smack into the ground below and lost all short term memory for a few hours while our parents were out, and he kept asking us the same questions over and over. I think I was 10, my sister was 8 and my brother was 5. To me, at the wise age of 10 (ha! This is the same year I rode the bike down the stairs), I knew we had a problem here and thought he had brain damage, but to my sister it was the funniest thing in the world - the screamless fall, the thud on the ground, the wide eyed spread eagle pose he was in as we looked over the railing at him, and the fool asking us the same questions over and over. She couldn't stop laughing!! It was like Christmas had come early!!

Glad both our little brothers are okay! Tough little cookies, huh?

:-)

Srg said...

That is histerical! I have the whole image in my head and I'm still laughing over here.

SkylersDad said...

That is a terrific story!

SouthernBelle said...

Hahaha, that's hilarious. Kudos to your brother for confirming your innocence at the peril of his pride!

Ms. Florida Transplant said...

That is hilarous!!! I used to slide down our stairs on mats, but I was never dumb enough to do it on something with wheels - that must be a guy thing. :)

Lisa said...

It's sick, but people falling down is hilarious! What's that about? Poor little guy and I am surprised you're still alive. You must have very patient parents!

Sassy Britches said...

I love it! No denials; complete and utter truth. Which makes it better for storytelling down the road! (I wonder if my brother thought of that when he dared me to jump off the bridge by our house? No water; it was a sand belly-flop. I'm so gullible.)

Giggle Pixie said...

Okay, that made me snort. Good thing I was only drinking water at the time. :-)

Morgan the Muse said...

Oh, wow. That is a case of being in the wrong place at the wrong time. But they believed you, so that is good. Poor guy.

Ron Centeno said...

:-)Poor little bro. Hurt and embarrased because you saw the whole thing.

words words words said...

I can see it in my mind's eye and it is glorious!

All this talk of embarrassment and falling down gives me an idea for a post.

J.J. in L.A. said...

Your brother told the truth? Imagine that! Any one of mine would've screamed bloody murder and pointed a finger at me...even if I wasn't laughing at him, which I would have been.

Fancy Schmancy said...

OMG, my cousin is the same way. Trips, falls, anything makes her laugh. If there's blood it makes her laugh even harder. I usually don't find this amusing because she is usually laughing at my clumsy ass!