Flying Monkeys: Part II - War On Terror

As of 2009-01-01, SCOPE-TECH has announced that it has joined the Americans in their "War on Terror." Since SCOPE-TECH is a corporate think tank, and not a country, some steps were required first. Primarily, it required us to become a country.

And that required territory.

As a small corporation, we needed to think small. First we thought of buying out S.M.O.M. (The Sovereign Military Order of Malta) But, the full name confused and confounded us. Despite the name: "Sovereign Military Hospitaller Order of Saint John of Jerusalem, of Rhodes and of Malta", it is not located in Jerusalem, Rhodes, or Malta. It is actually located in Rome. Since we don't have anything against the Italians, we ruled that out.

After a quick
Wiki, all the bits fell in place. It turns out that the French had a little bit of property that needed "liberated": St. Pierre & Miquelon. These two little islands, located off the coast of Newfoundland, are the home of about 7,000 French fishermen. Since we recently canceled our flying monkey project, we hired the Anaheim Angels' Rally Monkey away from Disney Corp, and sent him. After all, he's a hyperactive monkey, and they're 7,000 French fisherman, with nary an organ grinder in sight. Not really a fair fight. He strode at the frightened French, wielding a strange and mysterious object. Terrified by that which they did not understand, they huddled together, quivering like brie left too long in the sun. The Rally Monkey lifted his weapon on high (a bar of Zest, for they smelled like brie left in the sun too long also), and went into a lather.

One could say he "mopped them up." Afterwards, using his powers of mime control, he convinced them that they were all prisoners trapped inside invisible boxes. One tried escaping by pulling himself out with an invisible rope, but an irresistible wind forced him back.

Now that we had our country, we had to deal with the issue of
flags. We had to replace the old St. Pierre & Miquelon flag (see above), pretty as it was with ship and the lions and all, and rechristen it, as the 'Flying Monkey Ranch'.

Oh yeah, the "Flying Monkeys - Mach II". Stay tuned.


Cora said...

Quivering like brie left too long in the sun.... Hee hee hee. Maybe I'll make that my new catchphrase....

Dr Zibbs said...

Mimes are menace. Just thought you should be aware of that Scope.

Candy's daily Dandy said...

Where are the T-shirts and mugs?? I want to but some merch!!

Scope said...

Cora - YOUR pleasure is MY pleasure. Now that's a catch phrase I live by. ;-)

Dr. Zibbs - We have discovered that all Frenchman carry a latent mime gene that the rally monkey was able to use against them. Mimes really are a scourge, but that Yarnell did have a nice rack, back in the day.

Candy - Scope-Tech does not currently have a gift shop. If we did, we would spell it "shoppe" just to be annoying.