TAINTed Gov

I was going to be all ambitious and write a cool post today on a "Not Safe For Work" topic. You know, put it out there on a Saturday, so you had the weekend to read it without "The MAN" watching everything you do at work. That would have been cool of me. Cool like Fonzie.

But then I went out after work, and had to make sure a drunk co-worker made her 12:30 am train (the bar we were in had a freaking 11:30 last call) so I'm tired. I'm hung over. I'm lazy.

So, I'm reading all your posts from yesterday while waiting for the room to stop spinning or a meteor strike to vaporize my hungover ass. Posts like Poobomber's. Posts like Grant Miller's. Posts like Alex's. I had to answer. I had to defend. I had to make the room stop FRAK'n spinning. So, instead of doing the actual work, I decided to plagiarize Chris Crocker instead. (Actual transcript can be found HERE.)

And now, for your enter-TAINT-ment…

How fucking dare anyone out there make fun of BLAGOJEVICH after all HE has been
through!

HE lost HIS aunt, HE went through a divorce. HE had two
fuckin kids.

HIS husband turned out to be a user, a cheater, and
now HE's going through a custody battle. All you people care about is….. readers
and making money off of HIM.

HE’S A HUMAN! (ah! ooh!) What you
don’t realize is that BLAGOJEVICH is making you all this money and all you do is
write a bunch of crap about HIM.

HE hasn’t performed on stage in
years. HIS song is called “give me more” for a reason because all you people
want is MORE! MORE-MORE, MORE: MORE!

LEAVE HIM ALONE! You are lucky
HE even performed for you BASTARDS!
LEAVE B ALONE!…..Please.

Perez Hilton talked about professionalism and said
if BLAGOJEVICH was a professional HE would’ve pulled it off no matter
what.

Speaking of professionalism, when is it professional to
publicly bash someone who is going through a hard time.

Leave
BLAGOJEVICH Alone Please…. !
Leave BLAGOJEVICH Spears alone!… Right now!….I
mean it.!

Anyone that has a problem with HIM you deal with me,
because HE is not well right now.

LEAVE HIM ALONE!

I was going to include the Chris Crocker video, but I have this song stuck in my head now.


My work is done here. I think I hear the meteor coming.